Get Into Action with the Toss of a Cap

by Sue Mitchell on 27. Aug, 2010 in decision making, overthinking, taking action

Last night I told Brandi Uyemura that she could publish the “fact” that I offer a free report on my website called, “Fun and Simple Ways to Lose Your Overwhelm and Find Your Focus.”

I have no such free report.

Yet.

Now that I’ve told her that, and she’s going to put it in the bio of my guest post that she’s publishing in less than two weeks, I guess I’d better get my ass in gear and create the promised document.

I’ve been wavering back and forth all summer about something new I can offer people to help them get to know me and my work, but there was always more time to contemplate, in the hopes that I’d get it exactly right.

While that time spent thinking was what allowed me to simply blurt out the title, if I hadn’t had the opportunity to commit myself to the task, who knows how much longer I would have put it off?

This technique has been referred to as “tossing your cap over the wall.” It was first mentioned by the Irish writer Frank O’Connor. He wrote:

“When as kids we came to an orchard wall that seemed too high to climb, we took off our caps and tossed them over the wall, and then we had no choice but to follow them.”

President Kennedy quoted O’Connor when inspiring the country about sending people to the moon:

“This nation has tossed its cap over the wall of space, and we have no choice but to follow it. Whatever the difficulties, they will be overcome…and we shall then explore the wonders on the other side.”

Since I discovered this approach, I’ve found that it works amazingly well. Lately, I’ve been tossing my cap about a teleclass series I’m developing about do-it-yourself business retreats. (See, just tossed the cap again by telling you.)

Tokyo, JapanSome people even find the courage to sell a product that isn’t fully developed yet. Yeeow! No way you’re not going to follow through if people have already paid you for it!

Then again, there’s a limit to this. There are times when tossing your cap over the wall, as President Bush Sr. used to say (or was it just Dana Carvey?), “wouldn’t be prudent.”

Don’t make promises you know you can’t possibly keep. Save this technique for the times where you’re the one standing in your own way–in other words, you are the wall you’re tossing your cap over. The bricks in the wall are your fears, anxiety, uncertainty and discomfort.

Are you postponing action on something because you’re not quite sure how to do it or the best way to go about it? Are you procrastinating about something out of fear? Is there a way you could toss your cap over the wall so that you simply have to follow through?

If you’d like, throw your cap here by leaving a comment. If you tell us, we’re going to expect you to do it!

And watch for that free report…it WILL be here on or before September 7. In the meantime, if you’d like to receive it when it’s ready, go ahead and sign up using the box up in the top right corner of this page. I’ll be sending it out to everyone on my list on the 7th.

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When Not Working is Part of the Work

by Sue Mitchell on 04. Aug, 2010 in reflection, retreat

Sometimes you learn what to do by figuring out what not to do.

I just got home from a “vacation” where I didn’t get any respite from child care for two and a half weeks. Don’t do that.

Here’s why. You become an awful parent.

At first, it was no big deal. I lightened up a bit about some of the more arbitrary family rules. We were on vacation, after all, so why sweat the small stuff?

Girl preparing to eat bowl of candyBy the end of the 2 ½ weeks, my 7-year-old was eating candy pretty much every day, watching way too much TV, and was saying things like, “What the hell?” and giving a flat no to my requests. I had become the Permissive Parent from Hell.

That was really hard for me to admit publicly…

Basically, because I was on duty 24/7, I didn’t have any time to reflect on what was happening or check my inner compass. I was completely in reaction mode and lost sight of my vision of what matters to me as a parent, trading my true values for ease and expedience.

You’re probably wondering about now what this has to do with your business.

If you work nonstop on your business, things can get ugly.

For one thing, it gets very easy to become rather undisciplined. Here are a few examples. Do any of these sound like you?

  • You compulsively check email or Twitter instead of working productively for your business.
  • You flit from one task to another without setting priorities.
  • You work long hours but have very little to show for it.
  • You’re not getting the response you’d like from clients or prospects.
  • Your to-do list is a mile long and there is really no way you would ever complete all the tasks.

If you’re experiencing any of these things, it’s time for some R&R – retreat and reflection.

Retreat

Sometimes not working is a valid part of your work. You lose perspective if you’re always in the same environment doing similar things. So retreat encompasses two ideas: time off and time away. Young man sitting on edge of bed, looking out patio doors, side view

You don’t need solitude in a remote mountain cabin in order to retreat. You just need a change of scenery. It could be as simple as looking out the window for a while (NOT the window in your office), going for a walk, or hanging out at your favorite café for a couple of hours. One of my favorite retreat venues is my bathtub.

Sound too wonderful to count as work? Ditch the guilt. You will perform infinitely better in your business if you do this, so just do it. Regularly.

Reflection

Now that you’ve stopped working and are in your happy place, what makes this part of the work and not just goofing off is using the time to reflect. Here are a few questions you might take the time to ponder:

  • Why did I start a business in the first place? Am I achieving the goals I had? If not, what can I do differently?
  • What are my most important values, and how do I want them to show up in my business?
  • Are there ways in which I’ve been operating out of alignment with what’s important to me?
  • What is the greater mission behind my work, and what do I need to be doing to serve that purpose?
  • What have I been spending more time on than it deserves?
  • What do I want to spend more time on?
  • What have I been tolerating in my business that is holding me back?
  • Where should my focus be right now?
  • What is my next step?

Taking time to reflect will be, um, reflected in your business. Your business will be an expression of your highest self and larger purpose, and you’ll be clear about what you need to do with your active work time.

How often do you stop working for retreat and reflection? What are your favorite ways to do it? What other suggestions do you have for questions to consider during a retreat? We’d love to hear your comments.

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When Was the Last Time You Danced in the Rain?

by Sue Mitchell on 22. Jun, 2010 in creativity, psychology of entrepreneurship

After a long hot, dry spell this summer, rain came. I live in the high desert of western Colorado, so any rain is cause for celebration, but this time it was especially welcome. We’d come to expect the infamous “oppressive” heat day after day, and gray skies, cool temperatures and pouring rain made us feel like we had been set free.

When they heard the wet drumbeat on the roof, my son and his friend dashed outside. I squelched the urge to call after them about not coming back inside in their wet clothes and sitting on the couch, or making the floor slippery, or whatever other horror a couple of drenched little boys could produce.

My husband and I watched them out the window as they jumped in puddles and floated sticks in the small river forming on the edge of the road.

“We’re not going to let them do that all by themselves, are we?” he asked.

“No, we’re not,” I said, and soon the whole family was dancing in the street, soaking wet and fully dressed.

JERSEY CITY, NJ - JULY 31: Festival goers dance in the rain during the 2009 All Points West Music & Arts Festival at Liberty State Park on July 31, 2009 in Jersey City, New Jersey. (Photo by Bryan Bedder/Getty Images)

I used to do stuff like that all the time. Used to.

If Creativity were a superhero, its nemesis would be Inhibition.

It occurred to me that perhaps being uninhibited could be practiced.

When I sit down to work on my business by generating an idea, writing a blog post, or designing an e-course, I hope something brilliant and original will flow out of me. Then I start to work and feel wrapped up like a mummy. My body gets tight and Inhibition moves in.

Could this be at least partly because I allow my normal state to be uptight? Maybe my self-expression muscle is simply out of shape.

What if I purposely set out to do uninhibited things every day? The regular practice of things like singing, dancing, splashing, jumping and just being silly might help me produce a more uninhibited state on demand.

I wish I could say I did things like that all the time, but I definitely don’t. As I’ve continually added responsibilities to my life (read: job, home ownership, parenthood, eldercare), I’ve become more and more serious and inhibited. My joyful and creative self is locked up most of the time, and when I try to release it, it often shrinks in the corner, asking, “Are you sure it’s okay to come out?”

What do you think? What do you see as the connection between inhibition when creating for your business and being uptight in the rest of your life? Do you think being uninhibited can be developed through practice?

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Are You a Reflective Entrepreneur?

by Sue Mitchell on 19. Jun, 2010 in independent thinking, overthinking

The tagline for Your Business, Your Self is “Inner Resources for the Reflective Entrepreneur.” So let’s talk about what that means.

A reflective entrepreneur:

  • takes time to think about the larger meaning behind their business
  • checks in to see if their business and their values are in alignment
  • is continually learning, growing and changing
  • doesn’t blindly follow step-by-step programs without contemplating whether it makes sense for their particular situation
  • processes what they learn on a deep level and assists their clients in doing the same with the content they provide
  • is constantly questioning the messages coming into and flowing out of their business
  • is not a copycat. We all borrow ideas from others, but a reflective entrepreneur builds upon them and makes them their own. More on this in my upcoming e-course “Develop Your Original Idea.”

In other words, you think, and you think for yourself.

If you are a reflective entrepreneur, sometimes your thinking can get you into a bit of trouble. Maybe you’re overthinking sometimes. Or maybe your nature is to be thoughtful about what you do, but you’re not setting aside the proper time and space to do your thinking well.

Here are some ideas that may help you think about your business in a constructive way:

Go outside. I find that walking outside is especially helpful in inducing a proper state of mind for processing my thoughts.

Download your thoughts, either by writing them out or talking with someone about them.

Both writing and talking about your thoughts have their place. Writing them can mean journaling, sharing your thoughts with a friend by email, or even commenting on a blog (hint, hint).

If you do write your thoughts down, make sure you regularly go back and read them. You may be recycling the same material in your head and not really getting anywhere. Or you may have had a brilliant epiphany that was only half realized at the time you wrote it. Ideas take time to cook and brew.

If you do find you keep going back to the same conundrums, that’s a big clue that it’s probably time to talk with someone else about it.

Talking with another person can allow you to move forward in a way you might not be able to on your own. The other person’s fresh perspective, questioning and validation can really inspire you. This is why coaching and mastermind groups are so valuable.

Schedule regular down time. Many entrepreneurs get so caught up in their work that they forget that taking breaks is actually part of the work. When you return to your work refreshed after a break, you will be more productive and likely have some brilliant new ideas that popped up when you finally let things go.

Notice I said “schedule” regular down time. You can put it in your calendar if you want, but even if you don’t want that level of regimentation, you can still promise yourself something like, “I will take an afternoon completely away from work at least once a week.”

Schedule regular interactions with people who challenge you. (See above regarding the word “schedule.”) This can be in person or through reading.

Subscribe to a few blogs that you find especially thought-provoking. Then make sure you read those blogs as a separate activity from checking your email. Give them your full attention. Then go outside, journal or talk with someone else about the new ideas from the blogs that you’re pondering. Participating in the comments on the blog is an obvious way to rev up your thinking about what you’ve read.

Of course, old-fashioned magazines and books can also stimulate your thinking, but they don’t allow the same level of interaction and processing as online publications do.

One cool way to expand your thinking is to purposely expose yourself to the views of those who are completely at odds with the way you look at things. Be choosy here. Look for people whose arguments hold water in the reason and evidence department but simply reflect different beliefs and assumptions than yours.

Regularly issue a moratorium on new information input. You probably know when you need to do this, but you may not actually do it. This is a little different from scheduling down time because you might still be working, but you’re purposely not doing what I just suggested about exposing yourself to new ideas. To everything, there is a season. If you’re starting to feel overwhelmed and murky, try a media blackout for a day or more.

Okay…time to walk my talk.  (Remember that reflective entrepreneurs process what they learn on a deep level, assist their clients in doing the same, and don’t blindly follow others’ advice.)

First of all, take any and all of these tidbits and toss them out if they don’t fit you. Or adapt them to fit.

Second, do something to process this information. Clarify your thoughts on this by leaving a comment. Let us know if you’ve tried any of these things and what results you’ve gotten, how you might adapt them to better fit you, or why you couldn’t disagree more.

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Grab Some Clean Underwear and Go

by Sue Mitchell on 10. Jun, 2010 in overthinking, psychology of entrepreneurship, taking action

I have had a few ideas for businesses in the last few years. So far, I haven’t really gotten anywhere with any of them. The reason? Second-guessing myself.

Oh, I’m a master at that.

I’ll get up a head of steam and start working on the new project, sometimes quite diligently. And then, like carbon monoxide undetectably seeping into your brain while you sleep, the second-guessing begins.

That’s a dumb idea.

No one will care about that.

People will think that’s stupid.

Better keep this whole thing to myself or people will think I’m a delusional ass.

It’s too complicated.

It might work, but not until I do X, Y, Z, A, B, C, D, E, F, and Q.

It would be better if I revamped the whole thing.

Life was easier before I started pursuing this. Maybe I should throw the whole thing out the window and go back to the peace of mind I had before (not).

I tell you, this is a disease I have. So when some friends of mine started picking on the name I had come up with (you know the one–Your Business, Your Self), I explained that I couldn’t possibly allow myself to flail around trying to find just the right name and tagline. The idea was ripe and if I didn’t get on it instantly, the second-guessing would start and it would die before it was ever born.

I told them something to the effect of, “Time to hit the road. Just grab some clean underwear and go.”

And so this has become my mantra. Any time I feel that second-guessing starting–which it does several times a day–I remind myself to just grab some clean underwear and go. It helps!

I’m curious, though, what the clean underwear is, metaphorically speaking. What is the one thing I need to bring along on this entrepreneurial blogging trip that equates to having a nice clean pair of panties to change into after a long day on the road?

I’ll be thinking on this and will report back, but I’d love to hear your thoughts. What kind of clean underwear do self-sabotaging entrepreneurs need? Something that makes you feel a tad more comfortable and presentable, and like you’re at least minimally taken care of.

Please comment…or I’ll start to second-guess whether I should have written this!

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Naked in Times Square

by Sue Mitchell on 17. May, 2010 in psychology of entrepreneurship

Starting a service-based business online is kind of like walking around naked in Times Square.

It’s amazing how all your STUFF comes up when you’re trying to put yourself in the public eye. Stuff like:

  • Fear of judgment
  • Fear of failure
  • Fear of success
  • Okay, lots of kinds of fear
  • Overwhelm
  • Imposter syndrome
  • Second-guessing
  • Indecision
  • Difficulty staying focused
  • Procrastination
  • Setting priorities
  • Do we really need to list them ALL?

I haven’t found any other endeavor–except perhaps parenthood–that challenges your sense of self quite like entrepreneurship does.

When you’re selling yourself and your services, your business truly is a reflection of  who you are, so it makes sense to figure out who that is and make her be somebody you feel confident promoting.

And just doing what everyone else is doing isn’t going to cut it…this is a form of self-expression. The way you conduct your business has to feel right to you. You have to find your personal style and voice.

I started this blog to document my own adventure in the soul-searching side of starting a business in the hopes that those of you who are on the same path can learn along with me.

From working for nearly two decades in gifted education, I actually do know a thing or two about the key skills needed by what gifted ed guru Joseph Renzulli refers to as “creative producers.” If you’re designing a business, then you’re definitely a creative producer, and all of the inhibitions and self-sabotaging thoughts listed above are pretty typical for people like you (and me).

I hope to expose you to some new ideas and help you reflect more on who you are and how your business expresses that. I’d also love it if you’d participate with comments so I can learn from you as well.

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